19th January 2018 Morning News Wrap



M68!: Morning News Wrap. From around the Globe to your Frontal Lobe. Here is the News:-
Hey this will be an emotional journey….Your were warned.
Well I don’t care. I am on holidays and as you read this I am boarding a flight to Sydney to then get on a boat to cruise the Pacific Ocean for 8 days. So who cares about the news. Sure I may have purchased an internet package so I can still deliver the MNW each morning which I assume people will throw dollars into the Global Care account in appreciation. Thank you thank you thank you.
So here is the news:-
International Director of Global Care goes on a cruise…..wait that’s not news..Sorry let’s try again.
A displaced family from Queensland finds themselves on a boat with thousands of other boat people.
Yep I am making lite of an ugly scenario. Not cool. Let’s move on.
The Real News:-
Father of 3 year old toddler rescued from a car blames his wife…..sorry sir, from a dad who knows stuff and toddlers, you suck.. ….For the record both my toddlers were never forgotten in any situation.
Malaysian Flight makes an emergency landing in Alice Springs. I forgot to mention passengers were freaked out and thought they were going to die……Well I am thinking if they took a cruise they would have been a lot more relaxed…
Anyway check out the pic.
Canberra steel importer one of the three guys arrested in Serbia on drugs charges……Importing Steel Importing Drugs….apparently its hard to distinguish. Although I don’t speak Serbian so I don’t judge.
Still amazed at what makes the news….a guy caught a bull shark in the Sydney River, A chick lost 55 kgs, a parenthood star is pregnant at 46, Outrage over the staff at MNW calling a woman a chick….
Australian Open Court temp hits 69 degrees. Sure cause Maria Sharapova was playing…..The last comment was from one of the MNW staff who is 17 and male. But in no way reflects the attitude of the MNW company who we all know is opinion and attitude free. Totally attitude free.
Headline reads ‘Two Mistakes Amateur Gardeners make’ I suggest one would be reading the Morning News Wrap cause no one cares about your cabbage or Broccoli and how they are growing….All we want to know is how’s that bacon going on our Eggs Benny.
A Sudanese teen is sentenced to 20 hours after he forcefully grabbed two woman by the genitals two days after he was bailed over the bashing burglary of a young man…..I will censor my own comments here. You don’t want to hear what I really think. Cause I may say WHAT THE broccoli IS HAPPENING WITH OUR COURT SYSTEM? And I so wanted to not censor it. Maybe I should just say it. Cabbage. There I said it.
Police are hunting an old man who exposed himself to a child at a Shopping Centre.
Horror bus inferno has killed 52 in Russia…Now let’s think about how sad we were today when a pretty Home and Away actor died. Not one of the 52 people burned to death in this Russian crash were of any less value than her……but we dismiss the Russians cause they are ‘over there’. Hey reading more reports….the 52 were burned alive……burned alive.
But Home and Away.
Burned Alive…..52
52 people. I am sorry I can’t get past this….52.
52 people.
Well it started out lite….but 52
That’s all.
The pic is of the Russian flag.
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